I've Been Sanctified...

Published on February 23, 2005

“‘When a young man and a young woman give in to Satan, when they strip down like animals in the wild and prepare themselves for a lusty round of heavy petting and full-blown sex, what better reminder for them to buck up than a WWJD condom?'” Buck up, Reverend? Ouch. Even The Revealer can’t quite bring itself […]

“‘When a young man and a young woman give in to Satan, when they strip down like animals in the wild and prepare themselves for a lusty round of heavy petting and full-blown sex, what better reminder for them to buck up than a WWJD condom?'” Buck up, Reverend? Ouch. Even The Revealer can’t quite bring itself to alter the “WWJD” acronym to fit this piece of news: Rev. Dr. Paul Morehead, a radio preacher from Alabama, has trademarked a series of “divinely inspired,” five-dollar-a-pop “What Would Jesus Do” condoms, which feature pictures of Jesus Christ on both wrapper and prophylactic. Though many Christian critics are flabbergasted, Morehead claims his condoms will catch teenagers right on the brink of sin, and offers his own kids as proof. Morehead’s “tested” the condoms on his teenagers and reports that, “‘hardly a weekend passes when one of them doesn’t come back home with a WWJD condom completely unrolled and dangling unused from his or her fingertips or pushed up under the seat of the car as a badge of honor.'” Morehead plans to use the proceeds of the condom sales to build a home for unwed mothers, “‘A home that wouldn’t be needed if those girls had been carrying a WWJD condom.'” Sad update: This was, in fact, too good to be true.

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